audio review : SloLove ( song ) … Janet Jackson

This is fast, at least for a Janet Jackson song, so the concept shouldn’t revolve around anything “slo”. And if it had to be about “love”, her and her partner; man, woman, who knows with Janet; should be dancing instead of fucking, which is apparently what’s going on here. “Can’t control the heat when our bodies meet,” she says, “Baby, take it to another level tonight.”

The beat, a slick groove gorgeously produced by Anders Bagge and Arnþór Birgisson; you’d swear it were Jimmy Jam and Terry Lewis; serves as the backbone to what stands as, musically speaking, one of Janet Jackson’s best songs. With a totally different title and slightly altered theme; it has a romantic summer night dance vibe; it could even near classic status.

my rating = 4 of 5

2004

audio review : Damita Jo ( album ) ... Janet Jackson

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audio review : Last Place ( album ) … Grandaddy

audio review : Last Place ( album ) ... Grandaddy

Fambly Cat was supposed to be their final album, but it’s common for bands to foolishly announce retirement only to reunite years later, so Grandaddy is back. Their sound, semi-psychedelic folk-rock led by a stoned Jason Lytle, picks up where it left off a little over a decade ago.

There’s nothing here as instantly catchy as Elevate Myself, let alone AM 180; probably their best song; but This Is The Part is a real winner. Clear Your History, a new song released to promote the coming of this album, should’ve been included in place of one of the inferior others.

my rating = 3 of 5

2017

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Honey Nut Cheerios

Honey Nut Cheerios

Eating a bowl of plain Cheerios is a bland affair in comparison to this sweet alternative, one that happens to be almost as healthy. It’s a blend of honey and almond, or natural almond “flavor”; there are no actual almond pieces on the Ingredients list; that makes this Honey Nut variety taste good.

my rating = 4 of 5

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audio review : Loyalty And Betrayal ( album ) … E-40

audio review : Loyalty And Betrayal ( album ) ... E-40

The title, Loyalty And Betrayal, has to do with friends, which I guess is appropriate considering there are just two solo songs on the album; the aforementioned title track and a warning to big name rappers about the finicky music industry. Every other features a guest vocalists, from Clicksters like Suga-T to members of other clicks like Cash Money’s Baby and No Limit’s Mystikal. Nate Dogg should’ve been limited to one song and the Nah Nah beat sounds way too close to Lucy Pearl’s You; both are produced by Battlecat; but Ya Blind, a dedication to Captain Save-A-Hoe, is fun and Doin The Fool is a major slapper.

my rating = 3 of 5

2000

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audio review : Doin The Fool ( song ) … E-40 + Too Short ( featuring Pastor Troy + Pimp C )

The beat is a slapper. It’s a distorted drum loop led by a monster bassline and nothing else, but its ghetto simplicity serves as part of its allure. The song starts with a burp because it’s for, and by, “playa-ass niggas” who like to get tipsy and fuck bitches. “I told her I’d buy her some clothes,” Too Short says, “but I be lying to hoes.” E-40, whose verse proves that style over substance can be a damn good thing if you have the charisma to pull it off, fucked one at his place and shot a “fat-ass” cum shot on her breasts.

Doin the fool, which means the same as acting (like) a fool; my only complaint about the song is that potentially confusing twist on what was already a perfectly suitable slang phrase; encompasses more than sex and drugs (alcohol/weed) though. It also has to do with money, guns, flashy vehicles and 64-dollar cologne; the latter of which Pimp C flaunts to attract hoes, taking us back full circle. But make no mistake about it. This one is for the guys; all you “haters” included, “just to let you know this shit don’t stop.”

my rating = 4 of 5

2000

audio review : Loyalty And Betrayal ( album ) … E-40

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video review : Hush

video review : Hush

Hush, about a masked murderer intruding the home of a deaf/mute woman, is relatively uneventful until about twelve minutes in. That’s when the tension takes hold and never really lets go. It’s a balance between thrills and realism, trills tipping the scale more often than not, as the two protagonists play a night game of cat and mouse for the sake of the plot. The killer’s mask should’ve stayed on till the end though as it only adds to the creep factor in a movie built upon a premise that is genuinely scary.

my rating = 4 of 5

2016

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audio review : 12 Nights Of Christmas ( album ) … R Kelly

audio review : 12 Nights Of Christmas ( album ) ... R Kelly

This is 12 Play, the Christmas edition. I’ll give R credit for not including any covers. The problem with these new original songs is that they lack the magic of a typical holiday carol. The vibes are smooth and soulful in the style of the Love Letter and Write Me Back albums; there’s even a song called Letters with eggnog drip snares; but 12 Nights is nothing to write home about. It’s rather music to play softly in the background while Christmas Lovin under the mistletoe.

my rating = 3 of 5

2016

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video review : Creepshow 2

video review : Creepshow 2

There are only three stories this time, but perhaps that’s a good thing because this show is much better than the first. The Old Chief bit is dumb, but The Raft; a cross between The Blob, Jaws and Stephen King’s Cujo; is interesting enough. It has four college partiers stranded in a lake, on a raft, at the mercy of killer slime. The best story is the final one, about a woman who accidentally kills a Hitchhiker on her way home from having sex with someone other than her husband. It’s the one tale that is truly creepy.

my rating = 3 of 5

1987

video review : Creepshow 1

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audio review : Filthy America [ It’s Beautiful ] ( album ) … The Lox

audio review : Filthy America [ It's Beautiful ] ( album ) ... The Lox

This is the first official Lox album since 2000. Yes, it’s been that long. The Trininty set was just EPs and a mixtape. Perhaps Filthy America should’ve been another one. The album, which would time-in at a mere thirty-something minutes if not for two skip-worthy interludes, sounds more like a mixtape than the long-awaited follow-up to We Are The Streets. Ryde Or Die Bitch remains my favorite Lox song. Nothing here comes close, though The Agreement, which has a similar concept, is a notable highlight.

my rating = 3 of 5

2016

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video review : The Omen

video review : The Omen

Baby Damien seems normal enough, at least as far as his adoptive parents are concerned, but as he grows older, strange things start happening around him. This is a horror movie based on Christian theology, so the monster is an unseen force known as The Devil and Damien is its son.

With that, The Omen might be a real scare for Bible believers. To me, it’s sort of silly. The Nanny should’ve been the lead villian. There’s some interesting tension happening between her and the parents early on. Damien and his evil antics, which, to his credit, are inadvertent, are comparatively dull.

my rating = 3 of 5

1976

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audio review : Edutainment ( album ) … Boogie Down Productions

audio review : Edutainment ( album ) ... Boogie Down Productions

Boogie Down Productions isn’t about making you dance. It’s about providing knowledge, the kind that centers around uplifting the black race. It’s stuff you must learn, no matter what color you are, but you won’t learn about it in that boring history class with the old white teacher, so it’s up to KRS-One; a “Teacha” in his own right; to put the equivalent of a book in your head. He does that with rap music, which, as the title cleverly suggests, educates and entertains.

The album is enveloped around a college lecture. “Black people have created every music you hear out here in the street today,” he claims. Even if you don’t subscribe to his ideology, which would border racism itself if not for a song that explains he’s not just a “black man speaking out of ignorance”, you can’t deny the quality of the music. The rhymes are thoughtful and the beats; the Breath Control sequel, a reggae joint, being the best among them; are funky-fresh all the way.

my rating = 4 of 5

1990

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audio review : The D-Boy Diary [ 1 + 2 ] ( album set ) … E-40

audio review : The D-Boy Diary [ 1 + 2 ] ( album set ) ... E-40 audio review : The D-Boy Diary [ 1 + 2 ] ( album set ) ... E-40

E-40 showed us his Ghetto Report Card, Ball Street Journal and Block Brochure, so why not his D-Boy Diary? It’s an interesting read if you focus on the verses; he’s still a charismatic rapper; but you’ll have a hard time finding a good song among the 42 presented here. Too Many dumb hooks over cookie–cutter trap beats, the latter being much more tolerable than the former.

my rating = 2 of 5

2016

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